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Week One: Detroit, We Have A Problem.
by Asher B. Chancey,
April 7, 2008

In my pre-season preview for the Detroit Tigers, I noted that the Tigers have all the makings of one of history's great offenses, but despite their off-season moves they arguably did not address any of their needs - namely, pitching and defense. I predicted that this could give the Tigers issues when they least expected it. Little did I know that the Tigers pitching and defense would immediately give them issues, and they would fail to win a single ballgame in the first week of the 2008 season.

Despite everything you have seen, however, this is still a very talented team, and they will be back. And despite everything you may heard about how rarely teams that start 0-5 (and now 0-6) make the playoffs, this team is more likely to prove to be the exception rather than the rule. They'll win their first game soon enough, and should be back in the race by the middle of May.

Of course, they'll have to prove they can win a game sooner rather than later. Without further ado, here is the first installment of the 2008 Power Rankings. Enjoy, and feel free to comment.

1 Milwaukee Brewers
Record for the Week - 5-1 vs. Cubs, Giants

Cut a Brewer with a knife and you’ll end up covered in raw talent.
2 St. Louis Cardinals
Record for the Week - 5-1 vs. Rockies, Nationals

Dear Scott Rolen: Boy did you back the wrong horse.
3 Arizona Diamondbacks
Record for the Week - 4-2 vs. Reds, Rockies

Kingman-no-more? Young on pace to match 2007 BB total by mid-May.
4 Toronto Blue Jays
Record for the Week - 4-2 vs. Yankees, Red Sox

Blue Jays have "Pitching Staff I Am Most Ashamed of Not Predicting".
5 Cincinnati Reds
Record for the Week - 4-2 vs. D'Backs, Phillies

Come on guys. The name of the game is to hit (.230 AVG/.329 OBP).
6 Baltimore Orioles
Record for the Week - 2-4 vs. Rays, Mariners

D. Cabrera walks batters like he’s raising money for cancer research.
7 Boston Red Sox
Record for the Week - 3-4 vs. A's, Indians

Batter Beware: BoSox pitchers: 59 Ks in 60.0 innings.
8 Chicago White Sox
Record for the Week - 4-2 vs. Indians, Tigers

2008 is an even year, so Sox will be all offense.
9 San Diego Padres
Record for the Week - 4-3 vs. Astros, Giants

Petco Park = Coor’s Field for pitchers; Jake Peavy = Todd Helton?
10 Los Angeles Dodgers
Record for the Week - 4-2 vs. Giants, Padres

Find a three-player combo less valuable than Jones-Pierre-Kemp so far.
11 Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim
Record for the Week - 4-3 vs. Twins, Rangers

Jon Garland auditioning for role in those “clap-on, clap-off” commercials.
12 Atlanta Braves
Record for the Week - 3-3 vs. Pirates, Mets

Say what you will about Kotsay, he’s lapping Andruw Jones right now.
13 New York Mets
Record for the Week - 2-3 vs. Marlins, Braves

Santana and Perez could be the Latino Johnson and Schilling
14 Cleveland Indians
Record for the Week - 3-3 vs. White Sox, A's

Uh-oh: Sabathia + Carmona = 16 BB, 16 K. in 23.2 innings
15 Kansas City Royals
Record for the Week - 4-2 vs. Tigers, Twins

You have our attention. Now, explain how you win w/B. Tomko.
16 Chicago Cubs
Record for the Week - 3-3 vs. Brewers, Astros

Look, just because Soriano never succeeded batting second before . . .
17 Oakland Athletics
Record for the Week - 3-4 vs. Red Sox, Blue Jays

Harden showing fans what they’ll miss when he gets hurt next month.
18 Minnesota Twins
Record for the Week - 3-4 vs. Angels, Royals

Pretty good record considering early underperformance.
19 Tampa Bay Rays
Record for the Week - 3-2 vs. Orioles, Yankees

Hitters have apparently gone on strike to protest Longoria demotion.
20New York Yankees
Record for the Week - 3-3 vs. Blue Jays, Rays

Hard to get excited about even hating the Yankees at this point.
21 Texas Rangers
Record for the Week - 3-3 vs. Mariners, Angels

I’m starting to think this Marlon Byrd kid isn’t going to pan out.
22 Washington Nationals
Record for the Week - 3-4 vs. Braves, Phillies, Cardinals

Still Cristian Guzman: .316 AVG, .308 OBP.
23 Pittsburgh Pirates
Record for the Week - 3-3 vs. Braves, Marlins

Ad. LaRoche may become a blackhole, suck all talent out of clubhouse.
24 Florida Marlins
Record for the Week - 3-3 vs. Mets, Pirates

Trading Cabrera was addition by subtraction? No.
25 Philadelphia Phillies
Record for the Week - 2-4 vs. Nationals, Reds

Schools offering counseling to kids who watch pitching staff in person.
26 Seattle Mariners
Record for the Week - 2-4 vs. Rangers, Orioles

Can Wilkerson+Sexson beat Ichiro in hits in 2008?.
27 Houston Astros
Record for the Week - 2-5 vs. Padres, Cubs

Mark Redman candidate: W. Rodriguez, 12K, 1BB in 12.1 innings.
28 Colorado Rockies
Record for the Week - 1-5 vs. Cardinals, D'Backs

This looks like the Colorado Rockies I know and love.
29 Detroit Tigers
Record for the Week - 0-6 vs. Royals, White Sox

How important is Curtis Granderson to this team?
30 San Francisco Giants
Record for the Week - 1-5 vs. Dodgers, Brewers

Eerie: Feliz relative OPS = 55. Giants team relative OPS = 55.

Questions? Concerns? Comments? Asher lives in Philadelphia, PA, and can be reached at